dennis j adams

Recently, real recently, I have been wrestling with the direction the Lord is leading me in.  The great thing about this is when I wrestle like I am doing, even as I type this blog, I know it will be a good result when the “match” is over.  This time though it is really deep in my spirit-man.  It hurts and it is quite quickening all at the same time.  I find my self wanting more of God and desiring to do more for God.  I am not sure right now that I am doing what I should be doing for Him.  I look at these past several years and wonder: have I been walking parallel to what I should be doing?  In other words, it is as though I can look across a fissure and see where I should have been but yet I am at the same measure but not at the same place.  I do not expect anyone to get this but if you have been there or if you are there then you know that it is a real place.  The questions I have for God are deep and need to be addressed by Him.  Certainly “man” in his shallow wisdom and selfish character cannot direct nor answer such deep things.  Even though, I desire to call upon man for his wisdom and direction in a time like this.  I cannot reach where I think I should be but I can see it clearly and the desire is so real.  The dilemma that I face throughout this time is to learn how to get there because I know I should be there now!

“Not that I have now attained [this ideal], or have already been made perfect, but I press on to lay hold of (grasp) and make my own, that for which Christ Jesus (the Messiah) has laid hold of me and made me His own. I do not consider, brethren, that I have captured and made it my own [yet]; but one thing I do [it is my one aspiration]: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the [supreme and heavenly] prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward. So let those [of us] who are spiritually mature and full-grown have this mind and hold these convictions; and if in any respect you have a different attitude of mind, God will make that clear to you also. Only let us hold true to what we have already attained and walk and order our lives by that. ” (Philippians 3:12-16, AMP)

Peace

Dennis

All scriptures used in this blog article are The Amplified Bible, containing the Amplified Old Testament and the Amplified New Testament. 1987. La Habra, CA: The Lockman Foundation.

Have you ever wondered what it will be like when the battle is over? When, well you know, that the marching orders read STOP, you have done enough, the war is over and the enemy has surrendered. Today, I had a day that I was hoping I would receive those orders! However, it was quite the opposite. From the opening of eyes and having the new day begin, I heard the orders “March on into victory.” I wanted to yell out, I am to old and to weary to go on another day in the battle to see the souls that surround my life come to Jesus! I am not willing to go further! Then before I knew it, I was marching toward another victory. The day has come to an end and I am glad for the march. Victory is sweet and the enemy is a bay for the moment. Tomorrow brings another opportunity to march into battle. Hopefully, I will be willing and not fight the calling of my heart!

Peace

Dennis